


you will always be a monster

by Fionnbhair



Series: it's like star wars but there's wands and anakin skywalker makes the right choice (for once) [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-18
Updated: 2016-02-18
Packaged: 2018-05-21 10:20:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6047938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fionnbhair/pseuds/Fionnbhair
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>the one where Anakin Skywalker is still an unmitigated cock up (but he's trying) and Obi-Wan Kenobi did NOT sign up for this (except for the fact that when he signed the contract to be a hit wizard, he kind of did)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. showing up on a strangers doorstep wasn't Anakin's original plan

**Author's Note:**

> I told myself! I told myself that I wouldn't start a HP au and here we are...with me starting a HP au. For the most part, works in this will be posted out of chronological order. 
> 
> Title comes from: You will always be a monster - there is no turning back from it. But what kind of monster you become is entirely up to you.

If you were to rank Obi-Wan Kenobi’s most pleasurable experiences, opening his door at three am to a hysterical house elf would probably be somewhere near the bottom. Add known Death Eater Anakin Skywalker mumbling incoherently to the equation and it officially hit rock bottom on his list.

“What,” said Obi-Wan. Ignoring the urge to slam the door in their faces, he clenched his wand. A wood door, barely warded, wasn’t going to stop what was probably a raid.

“He told me to take the locket - he did - go home. Not tell anyone. Didn’t tell me to leave him - couldn’t leave Master Anakin. Could never. He told me to come here, to come to you,” babbled the house elf. She twisted her towel and glanced down at Skywalker.

Obi-Wan glanced down as well, eyeing the Death Eater. He knelt, close enough to hear the mumbling:

“Obi-Wan, need to get out, need to talk- need to tell someone. Traitor, traitor, traitor. Obi-Wan, Obi-Wan.”

“Traitor?” asked Obi-Wan. He checked Skywalker’s pulse, it was faster than he would've liked

“Traitor, yes,” said the house elf, nodding vigorously. “Master Anakin has betrayed the Dark Lord.”

Obi-Wan ran a hand over his face. He stood, knees cracking, and flicked his wand. Anakin’s slack body, and the house elf, followed him into his flat.

_This is how you end up dead, Kenobi._

Anakin’s babbling, perhaps somehow recognizing the fact that he was safe and inside, ratcheted up. He gasped for air, “Water, please god, Kenobi please. Obi-Wan. Water, water, I need water. Please. Make it stop, make it, make it stop.”

Obi-Wan eyed the house elf, “Can you get him some water?”

“You’re not my master,” said the house elf, about as close as a house elf could get to rebellious. _Of course Anakin Skywalker would somehow have a rebellious elf._ “But...for master Anakin, yes.”

Obi-Wan carefully levitated Anakin to his couch, following a few steps behind. The moment Anakin hit the couch, he curled into a ball.

“Sorry, mate,” murmured Obi-Wan. He patted Anakin down and pocketed his wand. “It’s not that I think you’ll do anything, it’s just that I don’t trust you.”

The young man nodded. His eyes were fever bright. The house elf trotted over, carrying a mug of water in her hands. Obi-Wan graciously took it.

With Anakin’s head cradled in his hand, he slowly fed the man water. “Be careful,” said Obi-Wan. Anakin’s hands reached out to grasp the mug, trying to pour as much water into his mouth as possible. “You don’t want to have come this far to drown in a stranger's apartment, do you?”

“Not a stranger,” rasped Anakin.

As he finished the mug, Obi-Wan pressed it back into the elf’s hands. Trusting her, at least marginally more than Anakin, to make sure that the Death Eater (former Death Eater?) didn’t drown himself, Obi-Wan moved back to the door. He engaged the locks began etching a new rune matrix. It was smaller than he would’ve liked, not enough room to add in any detail beyond the very basics. More importantly, it was small enough that the Death Eater in his flat, of all the fucking places, wouldn’t be able to make it out from the couch.

“Alright,” said Obi-Wan. He turned around, wand still raised. “Why are you here?”

“Hold a moment.” Anakin held a hand up, looking down at the house elf. He took the cup from her hand. “Thank you for this. Can you please go make sure that no one’s waiting at my house?”

Obi-Wan raised his eyebrow and said nothing.

“Sorry, she’s…not actually my elf, just a loan.”

“Surely being a Death Eater gives you enough income to own a house elf,” said Obi-Wan, caustic. He slowly moved to closer to the couch, yet stayed well out of the Death Eater’s reach.

“Opened myself up for that one, didn’t I?” Anakin laughed. “I’m here because you’re the only one I can trust.”

“We’ve met once.”

Anakin doesn't bother pointing out that they've actually meant more than once. Reminding the person who you're trying to get help from how many times you've indirectly or directly tried to kill them wasn't the smartest thing he could do in his situation." 

“Yeah, well, being a Death Eater doesn’t lead to meaningful and trusting relationships,” said Anakin. He took a sip of water, hands trembling. “I have information.”

“Why not go directly to the Aurors?” asked Obi-Wan. He holstered his wand. Given that nothing had happened so far, Skywalker might actually be genuine. “It’s not as if I have a lot of sway within the department.”

“Not to the Aurors, never,” Anakin paused. Grimacing he continued, “They’re compromised.”

“No,” breathed Obi-Wan. They had considered it, of course they had. But to have it confirmed that the aurors were compromised was… not good news. He shook his head. “Who then?”

“The Order, of course.”

“Of course. What makes you think they’ll listen?”

Anakin looked up at him, haggard but somehow still vibrant, “Because I know how the Dark Lord keeps coming back.”

Obi-Wan collapsed onto a chair. He leaned forward, “are you sure?”

Anakin nodded. One of his fingers ran slowly around the rim of the mug as he continued, “I pieced it together by accident. When Topsy came back half destroyed, I couldn’t. I couldn’t just let things happen.”

“You were okay with slaughtering muggles but a house elf being hurt,” said Obi-Wan trailing off. It was perhaps the wrong time to say that but not an unfair statement.

Anakin winced. He looked away. In that moment he looked even younger, perhaps closer to the boy that Qui-Gon mentioned in letters years ago. Anakin squared his shoulders and said softly, “I know.”

It wasn't much, in terms of Anakin Skywalker's own redemptive path.  In terms of the war? Obi-Wan Kenobi was sitting a few feet away from a turning point, the turning point, for the better.  


	2. a brief interlude, Qui-Gon Jinn, and a bit of snark

“Can you floo Qui-Gon Jinn?” asked Anakin. He slowly propped himself upright. Whatever potion that  the Dark Lord used, it was making him feel half dead.

_ I might as well be _ , thought Anakin with a wry laugh. 

"Why Jinn?" asked Obi-Wan.

"I trust him, and he trusts me, to an extent." 

Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow, this was news to him. "I'll call him." It would be easier to deal with the Death Eater if Qui-Gon had his back anyways. 

Anakin nodded. He gestured toward the kitchen. “I'll just go get some more water, give you some privacy.”

Obi-Wan held up a hand, thinking. There was probably nothing dangerous in the kitchen except for the knives. He grimaced and nodded. 

Anakin pushed himself off the couch. He swore a blue streak when his knee threatened to give out under him. He heard Obi-Wan move behind him, quietly calling out some name. 

“You got out alive with the amulet, Skywalker,” muttered Anakin. He staggered into the kitchen, his free hand falling onto the bundle in his pocket. “One step at a time, Babylon wasn't built in a day.”

Tapping the faucet, Anakin looked out the window. It was fake, magiced, of course. There certainly weren't any majestic vistas in Diagon Alley. Not that he'd noticed at least. Trembling fingers came up to rest on the window as his eyes slid closed. 

“Are you finished?” asked Obi-Wan. He leaned against the door to the kitchen, looking somewhere between concerned and unimpressed. “Qui-Gon will be here in a hour.”

Anakin opened his mouth to say something and nodded. He cleared his throat, “I'm fine. It's been a long day.”

He shut off the water and pushed away from the counter, cradling his mug. It took a lot to not flinch when Obi-Wan clearly leaned away from him as he passed, avoiding Anakin’s touch. He caught a hint of smoke as he passed, along with something else. Something unforgettable but unplaced. 

“Do I have to watch over you?” asked Obi-Wan. “Or can I trust you?”

“Can you?” Anakin shot back. He dropped down on the couch, careful to not spill any water. 

“I guess not,” said Obi-Wan. He moved back to his chair, hand clenched on his wand.

Anakin scoffed, his head tilted back. Slowly he drifted off into a light sleep, Obi-Wan watching over him.  Obi-Wan rubbed at his face and settled down in the chair. 

He was up and out of the chair the moment Qui-Gon apparated in, his knock merely a formality. Obi-Wan used his wand to scratch through the rune matrix, breaking the chain. The moment he opened the door, he surged forward for a brief hug. 

“Thank you,” he murmured. “I didn't know who to turn to but he did ask for you.”

“Of course I'd come,” said Qui-Gon, briefly patting Obi-Wan on the back. Obi-Wan shook his head and stepped back. “What has he told you?”

“Perhaps it's best if he tells you himself,” snapped Anakin. 

“Perhaps,” said Qui-Gon mildly. He had the same expression that he normally had whenever a student talked back in class. Anakin shrunk back at it. 

“Sorry, professor. It's been...a very long day.”

“What do you know, Skywalker?” Qui-Gon didn't bother to correct Anakin on his title. 

“What don't I know,” said Anakin, still prickly. 

“Skywalker, do you really think this is the time?” snapped Obi-Wan. 

Anakin grunted and patted down his pockets. He pulled out a small package and dropped it on the table. It landed with a thunk. “That,” said Anakin, gesturing at the package. “Is the secret to the Dark Lord’s power.”

“What is it?” Asked Qui-Gon. He used his wand to unfold the cloth. Sparks formed when the tip dragged across the amulet. 

“A horcrux, of course.”

“You've got to be kidding me,” said Obi-Wan. He leaned over to look closer at the amulet. “Is this Slytherin's?”

“It might be. I didn't exactly hang around to ask the Dark Lord,” said Anakin. He crossed his arms with a tight grip and an even tighter smile. 

“How do you know?” Asked Qui-Gon, drawing away from the horcrux. 

“He talked about it, vaguely, and I had the delight of spending a large amount of time in the du Crion library recently,” said Anakin. He looked away, hand coming up to rub at the scar along his jaw. “It wasn't that hard to put it together.”

“We’ll have to take this, and you, to the headmaster,” said Qui-Gon.

Anakin groaned, “I was hoping that you wouldn't say that.” He leaned forward, looking closer at the amulet. “Alright.”

“It’s not like you have much of a choice,” said Obi-Wan, amused.  

“I haven’t had a choice for a while,” snapped Anakin. “The least you can do is let me pretend that I do.” 

Obi-Wan opened his mouth to snap back and shut it with a clack of teeth. It wasn't worth antagonizing the other wizard. If he'd spent as much time as it sounded like he had in the du Crion library, taunting him could be dangerous. 

“We can’t do anything until the morning, though,” continued Qui-Gon as if the other two wizards had not said anything. “Which means, unfortunately, that one of us will have to house him until then.” 

“I can do it,” offered Obi-Wan.  He turned towards Qui-Gon, grimacing. “He’s already here after all.” 

“I’m fine with staying here,” said Anakin loudly, determined to have some voice in this process.  

“With that settled, I’m going to go back to sleep,” said Qui-Gon, grave and tired.  “Take care, Obi-Wan, and ward your door better.” 

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes.  He followed Qui-Gon to the door, infinitely tired.  His head dropped against the door once it was shut. 

“You can make a bigger ward matrix,” called Anakin from the couch. “I’m not stupid enough to try to break the only defense between me and literally everyone.” 

“He’s so ungrateful and he’s going to get you killed,” muttered Obi-Wan, carefully etching the runes.  He left the, _ but it’d be worth it to end the war _ , was left unsaid. 


End file.
